A recent email:

Dear Alexander Wawro:

San Francisco State wants you to know important facts that pertain to your life as an SF State student. For information about the following topics, please refer to the web sites.

Blah blah blah boring financial aid, graduation and registration information ad nauseum.

A printed copy of this information is available on request from the Registrar's Office.

Best wishes for a successful semester at San Francisco State.

BWAHAHAHA.

This is gonna be ridiculous awesome.

A recent headline from the campus paper:

"Students join longshoremen to voice dissent on May Day"

Longshoremen! They have longshoremen up there! I've never even seen a longshoreman!

Also, you cannot delete an account on Facebook. I know, I've tried; it's simply impossible.

It's come to my attention that as a writer, I'm actually a bit shit. Given the circumstances, this could prove to be a bit of a persnickety wicket.